AGAINST

she is just purely against the idea, against the belief that i had strongly rooted in my heart. she had never show any concern for my study, it's only till i ask her about going to church on sunday then she come up with excuses saying that " you need more time to study, your examinations are coming. it takes up too much of your time", OR things like "you are just being BRAINWASHED." She would rather me to go shopping with friends the whole day, spending money the whole day, rather than to allow me to go to church for just a few hours." wait till you are 21 years old, when you are more mature to make decisions for yourself "

WHY WHY and WHY?? WHAT DID I DO to make her so against the idea?? it seems that i had never been good enough in her mind before, everything i did is wrong. She has never been satisfied with with my actions. What wrong did i do??i know sometimes im lazy, but that doesnt mean i dont care.( to her, im just a selfish, irresponsible creature). i know sometimes i gets moody, but i had never vented my anger on her, i had never vent it on her properties, i had never broke a glass just because i was angry.[is this really so unaccptatble?? does she know that im already trying my best to bewhat she wanted? i CANT be PERFECT. can she understand this?] other then these, i don't cause her any trouble in school, i don't ask her for things, for extra money( which i obviously needed). Is all parents like this?? *honour your parents* it's so difficult. such a difficult situation, choosing between God and parents, both are important yet they can't exist together. If i choose God first, my relationship with mumii suffers.(Reverse is true). Can somebody help me? Who in this world can convince my mummi?