so many projects and tests coming up- English project( School Prom Night), CME project ( haven't even agreed on the topic yet, and the dead line is next mon).. all this needs time and effort and MATERIALs, but she just don't trust me, what can i do? its as if that im e type that will use the computer to play games up till 6 in the morning.. setting password here and there, it just shows one thing- there's just lack of the trust, the communication, understanding.. there's nothing that links between she and mii at ALL.
Go ahead if you want to report to the police, go ahead if you want to put cameras around the house to spy my every movement, go ahead if you want to lock all your rooms, drawers, computers..Go ahead and do whatever you like, after all, this house belongs to YOU right? we are just some irritating strangers staying at YOUR house, we are not even part of it..
how i hope to find a place where i can truely called "home".. where it is filled with love,care and warmth, a sense of belonging and pride. a sense of security and not loneliness and fear. maybe.. all these only exists in my dreams, im going to bring my family, my children a real "HOME".. I will never let them suffer alone in the cold without any support and encouragement, I will never let my "HOME" be a refrigerator where everything in it is just cold, everydae is quarrel, accusations, blaming, complaining..whatever things we do she's always unhappy, for things we did not do, she's also unahppy. yea, the only time she is happy is with that guy, whatever he said is a treasure to her and whatever we say is just rubbish.. MY CHILD, i promise will never let you go through what i am going through now, i will give you a home just like the fairy tales.
[ seeking for a room to restore my soul, my spirit and my energy, im not going to let this rotten home to affect mii by all means!!..]
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